This is me moving on from the love that we had, ralph.

This is me moving on from the relationship that we shared. It was a good, eight months. Being with you felt like a lifetime and I will never forget the memories that we made together. You gave me a forever in such a short period of time. I’m grateful that I met you and I’m thankful that, at some point, we were able to love each other with so much gusto. We partook in something that no one could ever blame us for, and it was beautiful, it was magical, and it was real. But our time has come now, my love, and we need to go our separate ways. We will grow apart from each other, but to bigger, more spectacular things. You had been nothing but kind to me in those months that we loved each other – you put me first in everything. You would even miss out on classes to accompany me to my monthly visits to the hospital when you felt like I was alone and helpless. You were always there for me like no one ever had. You were the best thing that’s ever happened to me and I’m so glad, from the bottom of my heart, that we crossed paths with each other. If all those heartbreaks that I had to endure in the past meant leading me up to you, then all of them were worth it. Even if we’re no longer together, you’re still my ray of sunshine. Even if you find another, you’ll still be the one that got away. My love, I know we both could have fixed things together, but everything came spiraling down when we tried again. When we tried to save what little was left for our relationship. But while I struggled, you did nothing. When I waited for you to come back, you chose to be on my doorstep the moment I was ready to move on from the pain that was holding me back. The moment I needed you was the moment you set me aside. You decided that I was no longer important, that you need not make time for me anymore. And that’s why I became so lost and torn, caught in this middle ground of staying or leaving: staying, because we could still change -  for you, for me, and for us; or leaving – because I deserved to be happy, too. You forgot about me when other things preoccupied you. I did not want to be selfish and ask you for attention. I wanted you to see that I needed you, and I needed you, so much. My life was falling apart but you were no longer within my reach. You were someplace else where I could no longer find you, and I was drowning on my own, with no one to hold. Still, my heart ached to see your hand beyond the surface, in hopes that you were going to pull me upward from the depths of the dark water. But you never came, and all I saw was the moonlight glistening from up above, slowly dissipating from my blurring vision, and everything went black. A friend once told me that I was too generous to you and that I praised you too much – it couldn’t be helped, because you treated me the way I should be treated, at least before all the hungry heartaches began.

But, my love, I also had my own fair share of mistakes. I apologize for making you feel like you had no more time for yourself because you thought I was your obligation. I did not realize it. Please forgive me, if not today, then one day. My only intention was to love you and create with you some of the best memories we both could make, as lovers, as friends, and as partners. I’m truly sorry if you felt, in any way, insecure, for whatever I have said. I assure you that I did not mean to hurt you. How could I, when you were my inspiration? You were one of the many reasons why I decided to keep on going, aside from my parents, my brother, and my true friends. My love, please keep me in your prayers, even though we are no longer together. I ask of you not to resent me, or the relationship that we had, although we didn’t make it far enough to celebrate a year together, we were once happy and in love as boyfriend and girlfriend. It was you and I, until the end… or so we thought. But maybe God has different plans for the both of us, one of which does not include you and me together as a couple any longer, but as growing individuals who will go through many obstacles and challenges in life, to make us better and stronger for more life challenges to come. Until then, I will see you in my dreams, and you will always have a special place in my heart.